Here it is. The unveiling of the inaugural weekly top five. So, sit back. Relax and enjoy.
5. Robert Cheruiyot. No man in the world can beat this guy in a marathon. Monday, the Kenyan won his third straight Boston Marathon. Now, that’s a lot of pasta eating.
4. Hank Steinbrenner. It was only two weeks into this season, and Joe Girardi’s managerial debut in pinstripes, and Steinbrenner is already trying to manage the team. Yes, Joba Chamberlain should start. But the Gasman doesn’t feel he is ready, considering he’s only pitched more than one inning once in his career. Take it easy Hank. Don’t blow a piston like your pop.
3. Tim Duncan. Gasman yelped a loud, “TIMMY!” when he witnessed your open 3-pointer with just seconds left in the first OT against Phoenix Saturday evening. It was Duncan’s first trey of the year, coming at the most opportune time.
2. Pittsburgh Penguins. The Pens, who were financially strapped a few years back, have the interest of the league with a pummeling of the Senators in hockey’s tiring first round. Sweeping the Sens solidified Pittsburgh’s second seed. And with star power and offensive prowess coming from Sidney Crosby, a Gasman favorite, and the solid tending of Marc Andre Fleury, the Pens could be drinking champagne out of the Cup. If they are of age, of course.
1. No debate for the top spot. Barry Melrose’s appearances on ESPN as a hockey analyst has energized America. Seriously! Can someone tell me what igloo this guy crawled out of? Did he mush a line of snow dogs from Vancouver to Bristol? Anyway, Melrose still has hair that would make counterpart Mel Kiper Jr. jealous. And he was even humerous on the Sunday morning Sportscenter, stating, “I have a cot in the bathroom. I never leave.” Good stuff, Barry. Keep it coming.
Bonehead of the week: Martin Brodeur. Words can’t be printed here on how this guy acted after the Devils were ousted by the Rangers Friday night. He had the audacity to not shake Sean Avery’s hand during the post-series handshakes, one of sports best displays of sportsmanship. Instead, Brodeur took the high road, looking like a baffoon to every fan, small and large. Hey Marty, there are kids watching, and once again, this isn’t about you or Avery. So, take the long offseason and think of how you disgraced yourself in front of the nation.




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